


Loving A Saint

by MistressMind



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Introspection, Light Angst, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-17
Updated: 2016-04-17
Packaged: 2018-06-02 18:51:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6578284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistressMind/pseuds/MistressMind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>No one was more perfect than Corrin, a true paragon of justice and mercy. Jakob believes this whole heartedly until one night he finds his mistress crying alone. Can Jakob get rid of the ideals he places on Corrin? Or will she break from the pressure?</p><p>An idea I had that turned into a very long drabble</p>
            </blockquote>





	Loving A Saint

**Author's Note:**

> This ship has become my life, and I wanted to write some angst because who doesn't love angst? Though I honestly do feel like Corrin hates being seen as perfect. I hope you all enjoy this drabble. Expect more of this ship and many others from FE: Fates to come.
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated <3

It all happened so fast. The small isolated princess he raised had become an independent leader of a war. Day in and day out Lady Corrin would succeed in battle, losing as little men as possible all the while settling things peacefully. If it was her, the impossible was made possible. Though Jakob always knew she could do it. There was no one who believed in her abilities more than him. 

 

After every miraculous battle, her soldiers celebrated in her honor, drinking well into the night. Jakob would watch mostly from the shadows, cleaning things here and there while the drunkards had their fun. Everyone would recount battles that they had. Each supposedly playing a huge hand in helping Corrin win.This would sometimes result in drunken brawls about who was closest to the Nohrian Princess, but as ever, the leader in question would bring peace amongst her friends. Her actions just strengthened the idea of Corrin being a saint. Jakob thought this as well. His beautiful, kind mistress was a saint that wanted to save the world. How could she be anything else?

 

He couldn’t have been more wrong. 

 

Another night of drinking and merriment passed, and as Jakob finished cleaning up the empty bottles of ale, he noticed Lady Corrin walking off by herself. Almost throwing down the bottles in his arms, Jakob ran to catch up to her.

 

“Lady Corrin, allow me to escort you to your roo-” Now only a few steps away from her, Jakob could see tears flowing down her flushed face. 

 

She turned to face him slowly, her expression shocked from being caught in a moment of weakness. A hand is held up to enforce distance between them, as the young girl wipes her eyes furiously. “Jakob, I’m sorry you have to see me like this,” She chokes back a sob,”But I would like to walk alone…” Before a word could escape his lips, Corrin gives him a small nod and walks away. Just what happened to cause his lady to be so dismayed? Anger, worry, and fear swirled inside the butler’s chest as he wracked his brain for some reason for her distress.  _ There is no better way to find the truth than by asking Lady Corrin herself... _ But the fact of the matter was she wanted to be alone. Was her desire to be alone more important than trying to help his mistress in a time of need? Jakob clenched his fists as he thought, and without a second to waste, he follows after her. 

 

In no time at all, Jakob catches up to Corrin, just as she’s about to enter her private quarters. “Milady, forgive my disobedience, but I simply could not leave you alone after seeing the state you’re in.” His eyebrows furrowed as he stared at her slumped form in the moonlight. He could honestly say he had never seen her like this...whatever it was. It scared him to see that the bright person he loved and admired everyday could change so dramatically in the absence of people.

 

“Jakob…” Corrin began to shiver, and Jakob instantly closed their distance. Shrugging off his jacket, he gently wrapped it around her shoulders. All he could hear was her ragged breathing and his heart about to burst.

 

“Milady let’s go inside before you catch a cold…” More like before prying eyes could she her break down. They walked silently inside until they reached her bed, where she collapsed face first. If she wasn’t so distressed, Jakob would have found this comical or endearing, but the moment was so tense that he couldn’t find it in his heart to feel anything but worry. “Lady Corrin...please, if there is any way I could assist you I am begging you to tell me.” He stood a few feet away from her bed, waiting for a reply.

 

Stirring only slightly, Corrin twisted herself around just enough to speak clearly, “Jakob...do you ever feel like you’re not what everyone thinks you are?” Her words caused his breath to get caught in his throat. Hundreds of thoughts flooded his mind, but he still couldn’t seem to figure out what his lady was referring to. Choosing silence rather than voicing his thoughts, Jakob waited with his breath held for her to continue. “I...I get sick of it you know? The praise, the admiration, everyone in this damn camp calling me some sort of  _ saint _ .” The word stung him. He was one of the people who called her that. Corrin bit her lip as more tears spilled from her ruby eyes. 

 

“I’m not. I’m just not. Who in the world thought that  _ I  _ was a saint? I’m human Jakob-ha...actually that itself is a fucking lie. I’m actually a monster!” She sat up instantly and started ripping off her armor. It was a distraction from her rampaging emotions inside. One by one she chucked the hard pieces of metal against the wall as she continued to talk, Jakob watching silently, “But no one dares to point that out because I’m a   _ saint, _ right?! I’m fighting to change Nohr! I’m this gods damned  _ saint _ who’s going to bring peace to everyone! It’s going to be done perfectly with no fucking mistakes!” She screamed her last words, tears flowing freely as her face contorted in rage. “It’s not fair Jakob! I-I want to help everyone so desperately, but the pressure is too much!” Her hands cover her face as sobs start wracking her body. Jakob kneels in front of her, and without a word, holds her as if she might slip away at any moment. Everyone in camp was to blame for her break down. No one entertained the thought that putting Corrin on this pedestal would tear her apart. That a human being’s fear of failure would be amplified by the weight of whole nations’ lives being on the line. The sweet girl he raised wasn’t suddenly this powerful leader who could fell entire armies, but the same girl grasping wildly in the dark for the light she believed in. This was not one person’s burden to bear, but everyone thought she was invincible. Gods help him, so did he. Jakob was supposed to be the closest one to her. But now he was part of the poison killing her,

 

“Milady...oh gods Lady Corrin…” He smoothed her hair and hushed her sobs, “I can’t even begin to apologize for what I-no we as your followers have done. You are not some monster nor a saint. You’re Corrin…” Her name without any sort of honorific felt foreign on his tongue, but he knew she needed to feel human, “Corrin who laughs a little to loud, who used to be afraid of the dark,” He listened as her sobs grew fainter and her body stilled,“Corrin who...is so naive and innocent that walks into the hot springs despite it clearly saying it’s the men’s time.” A low chuckle breaks the silence Jakob leaves in between each point. And it’s the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard.

 

”Corrin who would fall in love with every story she read in our book club so long ago. Corrin with the patience and kindness that most people dream of...who says whatever she thinks no matter who disagrees with her…” Crimson orbs meet amethyst as the list continues, 

 

“Corrin who...made me fall madly in love with her since long ago in the Northern Fortress walls...” Why was he confessing to her now? How could this comfort her at all? “My Lady who I want to serve forever. You are not this saintly figure we made you out to be,” Adrenaline is coursing through his veins and the words won’t stop. Is it ok for him to say all this?

 

“But a woman with the biggest heart who is desperately trying to figure out how to save the people she loves. Friends, family, and strangers.” His hands found their way to her face cupping her cheeks. They were shaking, giving away how scared he felt. It seems as though all his reason had left him in his attempt to comfort her that he revealed his darkest kept secret. “Milady...please know you are loved by everyone here. Although we brought you to this...we would never dream of doing it on purpose. We wish to be your pillars of strength just as you are ours.”

 

Corrin’s tears had dried up long into his speech. She just stared at him in shock, and the regret filled every inch of his blood. How could he say that to her? Confess that he, a lowly butler, loved a beloved princess of Nohr? Especially in her moment of weakness?

 

“I-I will take my leave...forgive me Lady Corrin I do hope some of the rubbish I spoke helped.” Jakob sprang from his knees and turned to leave, when a hoarse voice beckoned him back,

 

“Don’t leave...Jakob. Do you really love me?” His attempt to flee was thwarted by her command, and his heart instantly lurched into his throat. 

 

It was Jakob’s turn to turn around slowly, “Yes milady...I-I love you more than I can bear. And it kills me to know that I was part of the reason that you shed so many tears tonight...I know this is horribly improper of a butler to feel this way towards his mistress, but I could not stop this love from developing. It would be like telling a starving man not to eat, I couldn’t even if I tried.” 

 

Silence. Gods did he hate silence. Waiting for her response ripped years away from his life. What made things worse was that her snowy bangs shadowed her eyes in the darkness of her room, so he couldn’t even read her emotions. “I-I must request that I quit as your butler Lady Corrin...I-I wish I could always continue being your confidant, but I wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable or worse am unable to control myself or my feelings…” He closed his eyes waiting for her command to leave her. Instead he hears the soft padding of feet coming towards him, and feels the warmth of slender arms wrapping around his waist.

 

“Jakob...for gods’ sake stop acting like you’re the only one in love.” Jakob was sure he heard her wrong.

 

“W-what was that?” His eyes shot open as he stared down at her tired face. This was surely some sort of dream.

 

“Jakob...I think the idea of me being this innocent idol has completely destroyed the possibility, in your mind, that I could love someone…” She let out a breathy laugh, obviously not as upset as her words might make her out to be, “I love you Jakob...I’m not your saintly mistress, just a woman in love. With a lot of feelings. Doubt. Fear. Anger. Sorrow...” His hands slithered into her white mane, and blood began to rush through his body again. No joy in the world could amount to the same joy he felt in that moment. “Stay with me...as my husband. Damn being my butler, and damn me being a saint. I need you to look at me and love me as an equal. And if you could, accept all my flaws and love them as you love my strengths.” Corrin’s eyes pleaded into his, her lips slightly parted and waiting with bated breath.

“Of course...I will. I have always loved your flaws milady-Corrin...I just got a tad bit over my head in erasing them.” He grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckles, only know processing the events unfolding, “I will no longer be your butler, but your husband. And your equal.” Jakob smiled, and Corrin returned the gesture. She needed him. Much like he needed her. And together they would tear down the concepts surrounding Corrin, so that she could be free of some of the pressure that was too much to bear.

 

Standing on her tiptoes, Corrin caressed Jakob’s face, “Kiss me, please.” A slight blush painted her tear stained cheeks. Jakob took a small pause, taking in the sight of her. Her hair was in disarray, eyes red and puffy, and she couldn’t have looked more beautiful.

 

“Of course my love...my Corrin.” 

  
The two standing shadows in the tent became one, as the new found couple sealed their promise to spend the rest of their lives together, as equals, with a kiss. If anyone could make the impossible possible, Jakob still believed Corrin could because he was so sure no one in the world besides her could have convinced him that his lady was not a saint.


End file.
